I have previously written about the red flags you might notice in the early stages of a relationship with a narcissist or a psychopath. Now I want to bring your attention to some of the most dangerous games they play. I am talking about the covert passively aggressive narcissists (or psychopaths) that deliberately push your buttons. They maintain a perfectly calm composed façade while having fun watching you react. The fact that you are the one who visibly reacts means that most of the people around you (except for those psychologically savvy will believe the narcissist, which is going to cause you further trauma and problems).
I have myself fallen into this trap way too many times and I want you to learn from my mistakes so that you don’t hurt yourself as much as I did.
In conflict: the mind-fuck and the gaslighting
Conflict is one of the situations where you can establish with a high level of certainty that someone is a narcissist (or in any other way fucked up). I will have a look at a couple of scenarios.
The first scenario is that the person is doing something that bugs you. You think they are doing it out of the lack of awareness and consideration. In short, you think they are doing it unintentionally. You want to discuss the issue with them, believing that once they understand how their behaviour affects you or causes problems, they will stop. You raise the issue with them. One of two things happens:
- The narcissist seemingly acknowledges what he or she is doing, apologises and says he would change the behaviour. However, soon you see he or she keeps doing the same thing.
- The person appears as if he or she is not getting what you are telling them.
Your reaction will very likely be trying to explain further what the problem is but the harder you try to explain the less you are getting anywhere. You feel like you are talking to a wall. The narcissist might come back with some gas-lighting and blame shifting – they would blame you for the situation. They could tell you that there is no problem that you are the problem. They would tell you that you see problems everywhere. They would tell you that something that you are doing is in fact the problem. They might tell you that you are too sensitive, unreasonable, demanding, high-strung, etc.
You might notice that they are accusing you of exactly the same things that they are doing. I remember the narcissist I got myself into trouble with telling me that I was defensive after every sentence. It felt odd because throughout the relationship I was generally accepting way too much blame for anything.
All these are techniques of emotional invalidation and psychological abuse. Because you are a sensitive person, you might start questioning yourself at this point. If you are someone with weak boundaries and low self respect, you may start accepting the narc’s version of reality and back out.
Chances are however, that you will keep trying to explain yourself harder. Get the message across harder. You will start getting frustrated. You would want the narcissist to see what they are doing and acknowledge it. You may want other people to see what the person is doing and help you against the narcissist.
The narc trap
This way, you are only going to get yourself into more trouble. The narcissist is a master manipulator and will make it look like you are the unreasonable one. The more frustrated and emotional you get about the whole situation, the more it will backfire against you. It’s not fair. I know. If you lose your temper, you will be branded the crazy and abusive person. If it’s a situation with someone at work, it may cost you your job. I am not kidding. Narcissist are super vindictive and have zero conscience.
This is why you need to learn how to recognise this behaviour at the first sign. You need to recognise it and stop yourself from engaging with it immediately. Chances are that you are heavily triggered and it feels like the matter of life and death for you to prove your point to the narc and the people around. You have to stop. You have to resolve that trigger no matter what (find a therapist or try some self-help approaches. Melanie Tonia Evans has some good techniques for that. Inner Bonding might work as well. These triggers come from your childhood and the narc is taking advantage of them).
You have to understand one thing. The narc is doing it all deliberately. And because narcs have no empathy and no conscience, they don’t care if you get hurt. They don’t want to resolve the conflict. They enjoy it.
- Another scenario is that the narc simply blames you for something that you have not done or tries to makes you feel inadequate kind of for nothing. You haven’t come to the narc to discuss anything. He comes to you. The narc has probably sensed that you are a good target to play with. Narcs can detect who is reactive and weak and they would go after such people and have fun pushing their buttons.
Frequently, the narc would accuse you of something that in fact he or she doing to you. My sister is a great example. She would frequently accuse me of being self-centred, selfish and treating the whole family poorly. In the past I would react in two ways. I would either feel bad thinking, oh, I am such a horrible person or I would get defensive. If I get defensive, the argument would escalate. Eventually, my sister would manage to say something to trigger me. I would react in anger and she would run tell the whole family what a horrible person I am.
Wanting to make the narc see what he or she is doing
Victims of narcissists, especially those in intimate relationships are frequently trying to find excuses for the narc’s behaviour (here is a good article on that.) They also frequently nurture hope that the narc can ‘get it.’ They don’t understand how deliberately these people operate. (I recommend George Simon’s book In Sheep’s Clothing to better wrap your head around this.)
You may have gotten as far that you see that the narcissist is lying and gaslighting and you want to confront him or her with that. You may have also established that the person is likely narcissistic and you want to confront them with that.
DON’T DO THAT
That would trigger the narcissist into the worst and most ruthless behaviour. They would see that you are starting to see through them but they can never admit to what they are doing. They’d rather kill you than get exposed.
The only way out is to totally completely disengage.
Smear campaigns
Even if you disengage from any interaction with the narc, the war may continue. You have triggered the narcissistic injury. Triggering narcissistic injury is very dangerous in covert narcissists and psychopaths that have a high level of control over their emotions. They won’t lose it publicly as the more overt less controlled narcs.
They will plot their steps to destroy you quietly covertly behind your back. One of their most powerful weapons is smear campaigning. They would tell anyone who would listen what a horrible deranged crazy person you are and what terrible things you have done to them. The problem is that most people would believe them (It’s crazy, I know, but that’s the reality. Narcissists, with their Mr Nice Guy facades can frequently fooled even some therapists.) The narc is vicious. He wouldn’t smear you just in front of his inner circle but in front of people that really matter – that includes your managers and authorities – people who have the power to truly punish you.
The more you try to fight against the smear campaign, the more emotional you get about it, the worse it gets for you.
The only way to fight a narc is to collect some sort of tangible evidence but if all you have is your words and insights, you are screwed.
So what do you do?
I would say the only thing you can do is to be your best self, solid in your integrity. You don’t fight the narc, you don’t identify with the victim role. You decide that you want to live in a narc-free world and if the environment you are currently in is supportive of the narc and his smear campaigns, then it is clearly not the environment for you. You can lose those friends. You can lose those family members. You go and find a support group of people who have been through this experience and you educate yourself. You also put the effort into resolving your inner triggers that got you hooked into the narc situation in the first place. You find a good therapist.
Covert aggression – an invisible problem
Victims of covert aggression don’t have it easy in this world. The actions of their perpetrators are invisible. The victim is the one displaying anger and heightened emotional states and is therefore seen as suspicious by the society while the narc (or psychopath) maintains his superficially calm facade.
I believe that the only way to beat these types is to learn to see their behaviour for what that is as early as possible and then work on our triggers that are hooking us into the conflicts with them. Really the only way to deal with a narcissist or a psychopath is to totally remove this person from your reality. Everything else is just damage control.
This post has seriously left my heart pounding in my chest and my anxiety is through the roof. I have been separated from my narcissist for two weeks now after a very long ten years of bullshit. This post, especially the last two paragraphs have said exactly what ive been feeling for almost ten years! For a very long time I thought he was right, it was me, all my fault, not a good enough woman, sorry ass wife, heartless bitch, ive heard it all over and over.. After nearly ten years, my whole adult life, age 17-27…… I left after he went into a violent and abusive rage in front of his mom and 13 year old little brother. Not the first time I experienced this situation, but it is the first time I took pictures of the bruises and didn’t come back the next morning to make him breakfast and comfort him. And even with my pictures and physical proof, and his own admission, and his continued harassment, mind games, and acts of violent rage where he pushed my 65 year old step father with lung cancer to the ground, then proceeded to drive maniacally threatening to kill himself by hitting a tree or shotgun if I didnt make it to him within the time period he specified which was impossible. .. Which led to my call to the cops landing him in mental evaluation at local ER fir the 3rd time in the last 6 months…… After all that, witnesses and proof of threats to kill me and himself in text messages, after all that horrifiing bullshit that ive been dealing with for the past 9.5 years…… He has still managed to succeed in making me look like the crazy, drugged out, heartless bitch, and worthless selfish whore to everyone including the doctor in the ER, my own stepfather whom he pushed down just last week, and every other person that will listen that I stupidly thought were my friends or at least cared! I feel so alone and helpless and out of control of my life. This post literally has me still shaking and heart beating fast! I don’t know how to proceed from here and I dont know how to cease all contact and its nearly impossible to get away from him without looking over my shoulder constantly ! All I know is that I want out and never again!!!! Advice please!!!!!
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Hey, I am glad you found my blog. Your story sounds like a fucking horror film. Let’s think what you can do. You need to get away ASAP. Your narc sounds like a real psycho. I mean he is not only destroying your soul but is also physically dangerous. Where do you live? Can you find a local codependents anonymous group to start getting some validation of your reality? Can you afford to move away – to another city, another country? Can you afford therapy? This is a long journey and a very painful journey. Your mind has been messed up with heavily. You would need support. But you can also start doing some self work on your own immediately. Transcendental meditation helped me to get some grounding when I was going through the depths of my crisis. I also recommend Inner Bonding and especially the work of Melanie Tonia Evans, she has very good resources for recovering from narc abuse and you have been abused terribly from the sound of it. You need to get yourself away. A good experienced therapist would be preferable – you will need a lot of validation. It’s going to get better. Trust me. I was in a very bad place two and a half years ago. My life has changed enormously. Yours will too. You need to find yourself totally new social circles. People who understand these things and will trust you. It’s a horrid experience being further invalidated by those you expect to help you…
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Thank you for your response, leaving town or the area isn’t an option for me. Not only because there is nothing left in our savings or checking and we are so far in debt its ridiculous… My mom and step father are not in the physical or healthy state to take care if each other on their own. My mom has been in the hospital and now physical therapy rehabilitation since the end of January and my step father is about to undergo chemotherapy and possibly radiation. I have no health insurance or funds to see a good therapist, I am literally worse off now after working my ass off for ten years than I was when I was making minimum wage at 17.
We are both from the same small town where everybody knows everything about everyone … His mom was my 2nd grade teacher! And my stupid ass has done nothing but enable him and make excuses for him and try to make him look like such a great man all these years because the way he looks to others is so important to him and he gets so upset and offended over the slightest most insignificant comment if anyone says anything about him. He would get so depressed and emotional if someone pointed out one of his flaws and I would comfort him and reassure him and boost him up to others. ….. And so I basically set myself up for the hell I’m in now. I did this shit to myself in order to build his confidence and self esteem in hopes that he would make an effort or attempt to actually be that person I knew he could be, to finally grow up and realize how much I loved him and believed in him… I did everything I could to make his control and power over me a success …… I gave him everything, I did above and beyond what I have ever done for anyone else and its never good enough, its never appreciated, it never meets his expectations and he considers it my duty to just serve him and wait on him hand and foot.. “Its my job as a wife” and yet he swears up and down that I dont love him or care about him or care about how he feels or respect him….. I’ve done all I can do and more to show him differently,… I’ve done things I never wanted to do because he said it’s what he needed and wanted to make him feel better and wanted by me but it was,never good enough for,him
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OK, you are really in a complicated situation. He is clearly a narcissist and you were clearly an enabling codependent constantly massaging his ego. Now you have to give all that you were giving to him to yourself. Being in a small town is probably the worst place to be in a situation like this. Really difficult. I recommend you to start with the self help stuff – Inner Bonding, Melanie Tonia Evans, meditation. Hopefully, you will gradually gain more strength and clarity and would get more courage for the next steps. Leaving that place behind would be by far the best option for you but I understand that you not ready or not able to make this step now. Just start with bits, focus on yourself, try to connect to yourself as much as you can. What I see as a problem is that most of the people around you is likely going to further invalidate you and that’s the last thing you need…
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It gets better. It really does. But you have to protect and heal yourself!
Document everything however you can. Get a calendar, use Google Docs. Keep all text messages and emails. Cut off and control contact as much as possible. Require all contact to be in a written format. If you have to deal with him in person, just hit record on your phone. Tell him you’re going to do so if the law requires. Given enough time, he will lie himself into a corner, and you’ll have the evidence you need. And all of this documentation will do two things: give you a sense of control and show you that no matter his gas lighting, you aren’t in the wrong; he is.
The more vociferously you try to tell people the truth, the more narcissistic supply you feed him and the less they believe you. Don’t worry about others (I know, easier said than done). Worry about YOU. You have to start thinking of him as a child throwing a tantrum and try not to care about his fits.
And take a look at a book called Boundaries by Cloud. He’s a Christian counselor, but his work would be helpful for anyone who needs help standing up for herself and establishing her own boundaries. It’s been tremendous for me. And this will help with your relationship with your family, too.
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I know exactly how you feel! This is a great article that I’ve added to my archives as well as shared on my own fb page. I’m always in hopes of bringing more understanding , compassion and awareness to the non afflicted by this Malevolent form of evil.
I thought I’d share with you the article I read when first learning what I’d been dealing with for so long and what was life changing in terms of the validation I so desperately needed.
I’m sure you’ll feel just the same way! All the best my dear one! https://nomoreshamingtheabused.com/2018/01/02/murder-death-by-covert-abuse/
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Thank you for your comment Page! I am glad that you liked my article and thank you for sharing it on facebook 🙂 And thanks for sharing the article with me 🙂
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What if, the Covert Narcissist is your Father, and the flying monkeys are the people he employs at the family business you work at too. What if the family business is all you know, and leaving it at age 40 would be like starting your professional work life all over again. What if, your father was advising the flying monkeys that they will soon own the business. What if you only just found out what narcissism is. How does one deal with this? it seems the only advise i get is to run and hide.
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You will do whatever is right for you. I have just recently written a story on setting boundaries with a narcissist in a family. I have decided to run for the sake of my emotional health. I know that it sucks but it’s up for you to decide how much hurtful and damaging to you your father’s behaviour is. It’s up to you to decide whether you can tolerate it or not. You can try to set boundaries and decide based on the results you get: https://terezashealthblog.wordpress.com/2018/03/30/how-to-set-boundaries-with-narcissists-and-stop-getting-hurt-by-their-behaviour/
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This article is SPOT ON. And to make it worse, my reactions to his traps were used to portray me as a crazed woman who still wanted to be with him. He would call me stupid, retarded and “worthless,” but when I confronted him, he would say things like, “Why do you keep coming here?”Why do you continue to approach me? Well, it certainly wasn’t because I wanted to date him. I was simply furious with his repeated antagonistic and insulting behavior. After years of dealing with the shock of the transition between his nice guy act and this monster he seemingly became overnight, and then spending additional years… defending myself against his insults/criticisms, I finally decided to walk away, though I wish I had done it years sooner.
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Hi Lynne and thank you for your comment. Yes, I was there. Exactly there. The crazy bitch ex that is still in love with him – though I never wanted to get back with him, I just struggled to understand how the perfect love of my life prince charming could have turned into such a first class jerk. I hope he is getting his karma big time. I was called ridiculous and my personality, attitudes to life and interests were laughed at. I wish people were taught about these disorders at school so that no one has to learn these lessons the hard way. These types are only harmless when we clearly know who they are and treat them accordingly.
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Why is it so hard to go no contact forever? I try every day and all he has to do is send me a loving message and I forgive him then he blames me for questioning him and accusing him of lying. I won’t bore you with details because we are not together now and he’s engaged to the woman he cheated on me with and they’ve only known each other for a month. She is a sweet girl and we became friends and she recently told me that they are getting married in three weeks. Just last night, he mentioned getting a house with me and having my parents (elderly and ill) move in with us to make it easy on them. I’m so confused on everything. He said he is not marrying her and he loves me and wants to be with me but we have a lot of things to work out. When I say “things to work out” he’s referring to him cheating, gas lighting, blaming me for it and lying about things and me getting emotional and upset with him. He said just what you described that he was broken and doesn’t know why he’s always hurting me but he can’t stop. He expects me to remain quiet and allow him to hurt me and I can’t do that. So, he feels that I fight with him too much. I know I’m better than him in every way. But I’m too weak to let go and I really want to let go forever. I do so badly. He’s cheated on me over 10 times in 7 months. He discards me then hovers back and love bombs me again over and over. His fiancé is stuck in the same rut. She breaks up with him then takes him back. He tells me he loves me and her. I can’t do this anymore. I work two full time jobs now as a distraction from him, I’m highly motivated to move on, I have a great support system that is also helping me move on. I hate that I still love him. I have to set tiny no contact goals by the minute and not the day. I’m trying my best but it’s hard. No contact is by far the hardest and most emotional thing for me when dealing with a narcissist.
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Hi Anna, thanks for your comment. You do sound deeply enmeshed with this person. But you are very right. You need to go no contact. He is playing you. All your observations are correct: ‘He expects me to remain quiet and allow him to hurt me and I can’t do that.’ Yes, that’s what they do and no, you can’t keep allowing that. I wonder what your childhood was. There might be some lack of self-love and self-respect on a deep level. You are accepting crumbs and think it’s love (don’t blame yourself though, we all have done that). Anyway, if you want to talk more, I am offering coaching and support sessions, you can send me an email via the contact form. Either way, please take good care of yourself It’s hard to break this bond. Most likely, you were love-bombed put on the pedestal, then torn down, thrown to the ditch, put on the pedestal again, kicked off again. Madness. You are recovering from serious psychological and emotional abuse. Please be kind to yourself. My articles on ‘why you still miss the narcissist part 1 and 2’ might help a bit as well.
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THANK YOU for this article. I have been going through some heavily relatable events in my life. I just spoke out about some severe narc abuse (I think, though who knows) and gaslighting on my blog, too, if you are interested. I would be curious to hear your thoughts on it.
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Making your self look crazy and stunned will make everyone happy in the end. Once you remember the past abuse, it’s easier to walk away. We know we loved these individuals, though why should we stay and torment ourselves. I remember some individuals are easy to spot at the end. It never changes, though the partner who’s been hurt many times. They can truly move on and be happy. Before we met these individuals, we were happy. In the beginning there was hope and happiness. We’ll never be that Disney character they wish us to be. They are that child that throws a tantrum, and makes it up by pretending everything is okay. Individuals with NPD don’t want to be helped let them hide and be what they want to be.
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Individuals with NPD frequently target those that were victimised as children and therefore have a lot of triggers and are sensitive to covert and passive aggressive abuse. They do trigger these people deliberately, they deliberately target them and cause further damage. I am talking to those who find this battle challenging based on previous programming and conditioning.
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